So I quit reiki two weeks after I was initiated. Wait, what?
The decision was very sudden, but it was a decision I had to make. At first, I decided to become attuned to reiki because I wanted to provide help and healing to my loved ones as well as myself. I also wanted to become more involved spiritually by exposing myself to energy.I believed in energy, and I still do now. But that’s a different story. The prologue to my reiki chapter was that I wanted to be of service and be more in tune with my surroundings on an energetic level.
So I was initiated to reiki, and it was wonderful. I felt energy. I used to be able to feel energy before, but after I was initiated, the experience was much more powerful than ever before. I could feel energy surging through my chakra centres when I focused my intention on them. I could feel heat gathering in my hands when I got into the “reiki” zone. I could scan another person’s aura and identify where their ailments were. In short, it was pretty cool and exhilarating. Aside from the positive affirmations from others,I experienced many positive changes as well. I was much more engaged with my intuition. When I meditated, I could see symbolic visions in my mind’s eye relevant to my chakra centres. For example, I saw an unimpressed baboon once when I focused on my solar plexus centre–which was the chakra centre that governed your sense of self and self-worth. I looked up baboon on the internet and its symbolic meaning as an animal totem–as it turned out that the lesson of the baboon is that you should never be afraid to express your emotions, even your negative ones. It made a lot of sense to me because I wear my heart on my sleeve when it comes to positive emotions, but expressing my negative emotions to others has always been a challenge for me, and I knew it was something that I needed to work on.
Anyway. During the brief two weeks, I experienced many many positive things. Why did I quit if reiki has brought so many positive changes?
Well, I quit because I had a serious conversation with a family friend, who, long story short, is kind of an expert “energy guru” person and he knows a lot about energy and spirituality. I asked him about reiki and he basically said that nothing good can come out of reiki in the long run. Why? Because from the perspective of energy, every one of us vibrates on a different and unique frequency. To try to bridge that frequency through reiki can only result in a harmful clash that will damage one’s aura and vibrational DNA. He explained everything to me using physics and scientific language, and although I am not well-versed in the language of physics, it made a lot of sense to me (he compared two energetic being to two electric devices–to connect two electric devices with different voltages, you need an adapter But humans are incapable of being or producing that energetic adapter that energy channelling or healing requires). After having that conversation, I also did some research on my own on Google to get some alternative perspective. I came across one post that outlined the dangers of reiki. One of them really resonated with me: healing others with reiki only provides temporary relief, and it is ultimately and inevitably promoting disempowerment because you are basically telling your “patient” that healing comes from an external source. It does not address the root of the problem and it takes power away from an individual. This aligns with my view about health and healing, because I believe health to be a holistic statement of a person’s well-being. It’s not just the physical, but the emotional, mental and spiritual as well. If you are personally empowered–if you are able to draw power from an innate source–be it self-confidence, security, emotional/mental balance and whatnot–this is so much more beneficial and effective than getting a reiki treatment because you will then be actively participating in the shaping of your life and the direction of your healing.
How I feel about health and healing is also another story (blog post, haha), but the gist is that healing comes from personal empowerment. Health comes from personal empowerment. Reiki kind of clashes with that idea.
Of course, I knew that. I knew that when I became initiated that I would never be able to magically heal somebody. I never wanted to. I wanted to provide that temporary relief, I thought. I wanted to create an opportunity. If I could do that for somebody–lift some kind of emotional weight just a little–then perhaps, that person could begin to see the possibilities of living without fear, without shame, without guilt…I could potentially inspire somebody, to heal somebody, to help somebody in need.
But that wasn’t the way to go. I would be taking on too much, wouldn’t I? Who was I to relieve somebody of their pain…since I also believe that pain was part of a person’s spiritual and life narrative? This is another reason why I quit reiki. I didn’t want to be messing around with karma (and how I feel and think about karma…is also another story!! haha)
Anyway. Long story short, I stopped doing reiki. Surprisingly, I didn’t resist much. Instead, I came to another conclusion. Personal empowerment comes from the sum of your parts: your worldview, your history, your state of mind, your attitudes, your actions, your words…everything you embody that is part of your existence makes up your energetic being, or your being. And personal empowerment can be cultivated without reiki. I don’t need to be able to channel reiki to balance and cleanse my seven chakras. If I want to expand my heart chakra, the chakra centre embodying love and care, I simply have to do things that align with . I will wake up in the morning and tell my family that I love them. I will hug them as I say good morning to them. I will be kind and affectionate to my friends. I will ask them how they are. I will offer to buy them coffee when they are swamped with work and stress. I will show care and express love to my lover and everybody around me. I will express love through my actions and my words. I will manifest love into my reality. That is how I can add energy to my heart chakra, if you look at this from an energy perspective. And I don’t need reiki for that.
So yup, I quit reiki, because I decided that on the long run, it wouldn’t be good for me, and I found something much more beneficial and magical instead: a more wholesome sense of self and a renewed sense of power that comes from the knowledge that I am able to actively choose who I can be and what I want in my life.