This blog entry is mostly just my random babbling, so if you’re not really interested in my life, no pressure to read it all. 😛
Two months ago, I decided to establish myself as a professional tarot reader online. I opened an Etsy shop for readings, joined the free reader’s association via Biddy Tarot, and did some casual advertising. I wasn’t exactly sure if it was something I would continue to do, because at that point I only wanted to experiment.
It was very exciting in the beginning–getting the shop reading, cherry-picking the various types of tarot readings I would offer, searching for suitable cover pictures (that are available for commercial use), and actually running it as a business. My mentality was: I’m offering free tarot readings during my spare time anyway, it’s time and energy spent doing something that I love which also happens to help people, and I might as well get paid for it. Besides, I didn’t think I would ever rest until I tried.
I was absolutely overjoyed when I sold my first reading. It seemed like the Universe was sending me a positive message affirming the path I was on–two days after I opened my shop, someone found my Youtube channel, which led her to my blog, which led her to my newly opened Etsy shop. I was excited and anxious at the same time–excited because it was my first sold reading as a professional tarot reader, and anxious because I really wanted to do well. I would not discuss the details of the tarot reading here because it’s confidential. When I did that reading, even though I was pretty clear on my “tarot worldview”, it was still one of the most rewarding experience I had ever had. For one, I learned how much I loved using tarot as a tool for storytelling, and one of my strengths as a tarot reader is the fact that I am able to express myself so poetically when I unleash my creativity. #PileOfCheeseBalls I guess taking the “counselor’s” approach just isn’t my style.
Anyway, long story short, eventually I noticed that “tarot” was starting to become a chore. I hated the deadlines–that I was pressured to perform free readings for the network. I think this is mostly because I was more focused on developing myself as a full-time private tutor, and my time and energy mostly gravitated towards that. I was also troubleshooting some energy-draining vortexes (by that I mean personal issues that just stressed me out to no end) related to work.
One of my concerns when I first started was if I made tarot a business obligation–would that change my perspective on tarot? Would that change my experience of tarot? It obviously did because tarot, like I said, became a chore. Some tarot readers read for others out of the sheer desire to help and provide guidance–that is an important aspect for me, too, but for me I feel like I do it for more “selfish” reasons. I read for others out of the sheer love of tarot. This is of course one of the obvious reasons for anyone to get into tarot, but I feel like if we put all our “reasons” on a pie chart, my love and passion will be occupying like 90% of it, while the rest of the 10% is receiving positive feedback and hearing that my reading has helped someone in some way.
It seems logical to “do what you love” for a living but I kind of feel like right now isn’t the time for me. For one, although I’ve learned a great deal and (as cheesy as this sounds) I have some wisdom to offer, I feel like there’s something I have to do first–some more things I have to learn first before I really establish myself as a reader. Besides, it’s not something I *must* do on my life’s to-do list, anyway–I just thought it would be fun. Right now, I want to continue my journey with teaching and eventually open up a classroom or after-school academy. There are so many things I want to do in life–I want to publish a few e-books as well (need to get going with my tarot writing book), get into photography, yaddiyaddaya (my version of “etc.”, “etc.”). And I get my whole life to do them. 🙂 That’s the beauty of it.
Anyway. So *in conclusion* I decided to put my tarot shop idea on the shelf for a while. I will probably revisit it later but yeah, right now I just don’t have the time to really invest in it as a business and really spend time developing it, marketing it and promoting it.
On a totally random note, Midori Traveler’s Notebooks are AMAZING. I made a A5 sized one for myself using foam sheets and canvas fabric. It’s amazing.